Sensitivity : An Inconvenient Truth?

The more I have reflected on Sensitivity, the more I realise how inconvenient it seems to be.

For a start.

Admitting being a sensitive person yourself… feels inconvenient.

There can be ‘easier’ more ‘recognised’ more realisations that encourage greater sympathy than sensitivity.

Some are more diagnosed, they appear, for an example as a protected characteristic of the Equality Act (2010) – and dont get me wrong, this isn’t characteristic olympics. It’s not the point im making. Maybe this is ‘insensitive’.

Thats interesting.

Me trying to ‘make a point’ thats probably not quite as well articulated as it should be I might recognise as ‘insensitive’ . So.. what might be sensitivity?

Sensitivity might be akin to ‘making an appropriate response’

Sensitivity might be about realising who might be affected by a situation and responding appropriately.

Sensitivity, therefore, is totally Inconvenient.

Sensitivity asks questions, suggests slower actions.

Sensitivity feels.

Sensitivity asks – ‘who isn’t being heard?’

Sensitivity builds relationships, and cooperation.

Sensitivity values depth and quality.

Sensitivity is empathy

Sensitivity..pays attention.. a lot.

Sensitivity cares.

It’s Inconvenient in a culture in which outcomes, numbers, ‘success’ and efficiency are default dynamics.

Sensitive to emotions and lives, not to system protection.

It’s the youth workers, sensitive to the young people of Rotherham, whose voice was deemed ‘over reacting’ , and years later the report highlighted that the system didn’t listen. Were the Youth workers too sensitive? Easily dismissed? Inconvenient?

Sensitive people are inconvenient aren’t they.

Inconvenient, because they dont fit.

Many of the systems we live in look at the natural responses of the Highly Sensitive Person…. and rebuke them
Hanna Jane Walker (2023)

Maybe the System needs to change.

Because if there were no sensitive people – the system would have imploded by now, already.

When the system tightens, when it gets harsher. The Sensitive person is going to feel it first.

The Canary in the Mine.

Yet, What’s strange is that when a micro system like a school develops healthier emotional responses, prioritising the practice of emotions of health, empathy, listening, cooperation and holding emotional reactions.. it benefits the pupils towards better ‘results’ and creates better community and environment (Lisa Cherry, 2021, Conversations that make a difference with Children and Young People).. its not about ticking a box to say ‘trauma informed’ – but humane.

Its no wonder that those who have sensitivity, human values in caring profession leave by the droves, when the ‘system doesn’t benefit those of whom it is meant to, and in a way that should do’.

How inconvenient.

Yet, Ultimately usually, everyone benefits. (except the non humans, the spreadsheets and newspapers)

It’s Inconvenient for the farmers to recognise that their soil quality is getting worse, being sensitive to the changes, and having to adapt. (James Rebanks, The English Pastoral)

It’s Inconvenient to be sensitive to the needs of the planet – and not the continual consumption of it. It’s inconvenient to adhere to warnings about flood plains and deforestation – and not have buildings that get flooded or be prone to landslides.

And yet.

Let’s make this personal again.

Sensitivity is inconvenient yes because it is counter system cultural

But its also counter ‘Emotional expectation cultural’

It’s a trait that many try to hide.

More than that, a gift.

When the one person stands up against the system, for the benefit of humanity, it’s not that others dont agree with them, it’s that they dont want to be seen to agree with them. To admit being sensitive, caring and humane.

If you have ever watched the film ‘The Last Bus’ there is a moment ion it when the lead character stands up against a man who is racially bullying an asian woman, he is sensitive to her plight, yet the bully expects the crowded bus to be on his side because there is silence. The opposite is actually the truth. The bully is escorted off with loud cheers, yet the old man was as equally acting alone. Those who bully might expect that silence is for them, when actually it might not be, this might also be the case in the boardroom.

Inconvenient for ourselves.. back to being personal.

In addition …

Not always being heard

Struggling with boundaries.. and

Being easily overwhelmed.

Im not going to go into detail into these things here. But if you identify as sensitive, or recognise that this might be you, but dont want to admit it, then that inconvenience of being sensitive is actually just part of you, part of you being who you are.

However challenging, it is how you are wired. It can be highly frustrating, highly draining, and to have to manage ourselves in a world that often doesn’t fit. It feels inconvenient even to be wired in this way. Inconvenient to have to be thinking, taking in information , processing, working things , feelings, body language.

The temptation with something inconvenient, something unsettling, something that feels raw, is to toughen up, deny or pretend it isnt there. It takes someone else courage to believe the voice that speaks from sensitivity, It takes courage to be paying super attention and speak up. it’s inconvenient all around, but more often more humane for everyone.