Healing
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I was ok It’ll be ok Ive always survived Ill get through this Another thing to get through Im ok But I wasnt I was hiding I was pretending to say things were ok Whilst parts of me were screaming and wanting me to face them But ill keep running or saying things will be…
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But its rude to say it Just say it No, it sounds wrong Just say it I can write it down Say it James You mean its ok to Yes, just say it James. It feels uncomfortable, ill get into trouble No you won’t, Just say it, get it out Why do you want me…
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As well as the space to discover what was good for me, to see the situation pdf my marriage, and childhood, in a new light, and to get therapy to help me with tools, part of my recovery and healing involved me discovering who I am. Until then I had in the past done the…
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Its such a trivial thing, I said to my therapist (almost as I put on my jacket to leave at the end of the first session) But I’ve realised how much I like to feel appreciated Me, early 2019 ‘Its not trivial at all though is it‘, he said to me. When you’re appreciated, you…
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Like wading through treacle. Trying to walk through fog. Every now and again I get one of these. Beyond the healing and surviving. Beyond the self understanding, and in the safety, peace, love of my new life. Maybe I thought i wouldn’t get these. Maybe I had a vision that once undergoing therapy, once with…
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One of the main reasons victims of abuse dont get believed is that the actions that perpetrators do is so shocking that no one could believe it actually happened. Ironically the same people who describe such things have to articulate something so awful and shocking, that it would be beyond their own mental capacity to…
James Ballantyne 