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Inner work is like a Sourdough starter
I need to treat myself, like I do my sourdough starter. That fresh flour, clean new green grapes and warm water all combined Stirred in a bottle Waiting for the reaction. Excitement builds as the bubbles emerge as its kept… Continue reading
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2 years of being able to breathe
I realised this week that I’ve been able to breathe for 2 years now, these were the first two years I’d been able to breathe in my whole life I remember when I walked into the flat 25 months ago… Continue reading
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Hell wasn’t the place I thought it was
Hell wasnt the place I thought it was Not the fire out there But the fear in here. Not eternal damnation, but present accusation, wasn’t the future to be avoiding, but present shame and loathing. Hell wasnt the place I… Continue reading
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Surviving Psychopathic Parenting (Part 18) Survival Self talk
I was convinced I was adopted. Or at least, thats what I often kept telling myself, when I pondered things as I walked home from school or time in my bedroom. Im nothing like my parents, I think different, I… Continue reading
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Recovering and Healing (Part 6) Being taught to say F**k
But its rude to say it Just say it No, it sounds wrong Just say it I can write it down Say it James You mean its ok to Yes, just say it James. It feels uncomfortable, ill get into… Continue reading
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Surviving Psychopathic Parenting (Part 17) Suppressing the spoiled brat
I want, doesn’t get I had to get that spoiled child out of you Its not ‘I want’ its ‘I would like’ or ‘Please may I have’ Said my parents on a regular basis, for most of my early childhood.… Continue reading
James Ballantyne 